Ask yourself a question like how one is able to tell whether or not they had the time of their “childhood” life and amazing thoughts rummage around all day.
When you look at a set of purple green yellow and red texters and think of teletubies. Or infact, when your friend is wearing a black shirt with red shorts and mickey comes into mind. Then of course there are obvious ones like passing by a cute dalmatian and thinking it must be one of the one hundred and one.
Trapped in a car with all four doors locked. Nothing you can do really, except to look out the window and think. When do you draw the line between the city life and the middle of no where? cus the border line certainly doesn’t do any justice. wherever you go in this world, name it the USA or a place you cant even spell like Novosibirsk in Russia, one thing you’ll have in common are telephone lines. They go for miles and miles and miles carrying people’s conversations across the globe (although im sure technology has changed the way those things work, definitely not my forte). So how do you know you are in the middle of no where? When you look left right and centre, and those dangling lines from pole to pole aren’t visible with the naked eye.
Three Words. Simplicity. Simplicity. Simplicity.
When i got home i parked my car into the garage and stayed inside for about give or take 20minutes, wondering why i took the longest route home today. It is incredibly,impossibly-possible how much we miss whats going on in our life. A 20minute drive would normally be how long it would take to get home from my studio. You know that feeling when you are just driving along the same highway over and over again? How did you get there so quickly? I took several turns along roads which were (to me) undiscovered before. I’d miss a turn accidentally on purpose and wait for the next one to see what they’ve got in store for me. I was wondering why the cars that are parked at the side of the street was all facing me. Turns out,I went the opposite direction of a one way lane (this was obviously not on purpose). Thankfully there were not a single moving car insight. So it took me about one and a half hours to get home and a heck load of fuel. There goes my savings account into a black hole.
I guess sometimes we just have to take another second or two to look at the big picture. Take a new leap of faith. When i did finally got to my room (the attic feels like miles away when u’re really tired). I saw two huge plastic bags filled with clothes and I thought. wow. He finally got me something i like. He finally gets my taste. It wasn’t until the 5th or so piece of clothing i took out from the bag which made me realize. These clothes aren’t new. They are the ones i sent dad for dry cleaning.
Keeping the red coming in a fancy hidden bar along a quiet hallway. while you reflect on the days you’ve had, you might think that you have been treated unfairly. that for some reason, your life seems to be far more difficult then everyone elses. negative circumstances rumaging around your head. we just gotta remember to… walk out of the bar and continue on our journey.
Post Traumatic Confusion
How do you know when you were meant to be doing what you are doing now? when do you get that “signal” or that “feeling” and say to yourself yes. this is what i want to do. even if it is what you were, so called, “destined” to do; what feeling lets your brain control your other brain? some might say when you know you are really enjoying what you are doing, that is what you were born to do. others might say when you feel really comfortable and happy with the surroundings around you, that is where you should stay. okay, so let me put it this way. when i watch tv (tv meaning pirated dvds and tv shows and other videos), i enjoy my self. i feel comfortable and i feel happy. but that doesnt mean watching tv is what i was born to do. so how do you know? how do you know?
we are all born unique in this world and we should keep it that way. when i do finally get that “yes, this is what i want to do” feeling, i surely wont say i want to be a “whatever”. instead. i will say i want to be me. and have a career as a “whatever”. be unique. be true to your self. dont try to please other people. why create something out of nothing only to let someone else enjoy it? (or, think that they are enjoying it). when do you get to decide if all this is worth it?
Flashbacks of a Fool
Who could have thought food could bring you back to those memories that are long lost? i thought that was music’s job. food can bring you back to moments you’ve missed, to another era of your self. personally, if i see this special Indonesian “cuisine” called Lidi, which are basically… hm?.. fried pasta with a twist of delicious cheese? maybe those of you who know what im talking about can help me out here.. i have no idea how to describe it in english but let me tell you something. it. is. del. licioussss! all these random memories just pop up in mind.
That moment when the school bell rings and you pack your bags, run as fast as you can to get some afterschool snack by the side of the road. enjoying these delisioso snack alone (well, i did) while waiting to get picked up by Pak Dasir, my driver for 17 years. oh, those were the moments. when school was like a playground where you meet your friends and listen to teachers if you must; when what was happening with the world wasn’t a problem (at least not in your own little world); when your biggest problem was probably forgetting your pencil at home and you feel like its the end of the world. ah, food glorious food.
-inspired after watching Masterchef :-)
ARIGATO, JAPAN (thankyou, Japan)
When a 17year old gets the opportunity to travel around numerous beautiful cities with a big bus following her around, a Fish Eye camera to capture a 180degree view of the city and a Diana to capture the wonderful sensation of the city, are like the passport of her world. leaving a hotel room without those dangled around her shoulders makes her feel.. naked. looking around in a new city i tend to forget i have two cameras hanging around and just. take it all in i guess. to be.. in the moment.
i know i’ve posted a picture of her before, and i know this isnt the kind of posts i normally post BUT this is definitely a must watch video. i am OBVIOUSLY not one who follow whats going on in the fashion world and the models and their collections, no. but she is just absolutely, utterly, genuinely amazing
When i see diamonds i think about the child trafficking that are happening around the globe.
When i see flowers in vases i cant imagine how beautiful the world would look if they were still in their gardens.
When i see expensive shoes i think about those underpaid chinese workers.
The eye has a (what i call) magical function that transforms what we see into what we think. two people can be looking at the exact same object from the exact same angle for the excact same period of time and yet we still have different perspective. i guess its true what they say. ones trash can be an others treasure
A ROOM FULL OF IDEAS
A little sneak peak to my little wonderland; The Attic, or another boring name for it, my room. when four
girls women are having a hard time to stay sane, it is quite impossible for them not to explode once they are put into a small room full of clothes and make up. after all, we all have a maximum level of sanity.
The Beautifully Bloomed Sakura
Leaves move, clouds move, particles in the air move, even if we try to freeze ourselves, we would still move. The Earth moves too. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if pictures could move too?
I am a Girl - The Girls With Glasses Theme Song. Directed by Angela Kohler and Ithyle Griffiths.L
Silver Lining - Rilo Kiley
And I’m not going back into rags or in the hole
and our bruises are coming
but we will never fold
and I was your silver lining
as the story goes
I was your silver lining but now im gold
hooray hooray I’m your silver lining
hooray hooray but now I’m gold.
And I was your silver lining
high up on my toys
well you were running through fields of hitchhikers
as the story goes
And the grass it was a ticking
and the sun was on the rise
I never felt so wicked
as when I willed our love to die